{"id":611,"date":"2015-03-09T23:33:51","date_gmt":"2015-03-10T04:33:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/culturated.com\/?p=611"},"modified":"2015-03-09T23:35:29","modified_gmt":"2015-03-10T04:35:29","slug":"kingsman-the-secret-service-movie-review","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/culturated.com\/kingsman-the-secret-service-movie-review\/","title":{"rendered":"Kingsman: The Secret Service Movie Review"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>One thing that has always baffled me about Hollywood action movies is the shootouts between the good guys and villains.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>It doesn\u2019t matter the distance between the two: Our protagonist almost always demonstrates pinpoint aim, getting the sniper in the shoulder or hitting the asshole square in the forehead. But when it comes the baddie, it doesn\u2019t matter if he\u2019s got 300 kills to his credit, he generally misses his target.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s frustrating as hell! Where\u2019s the damn balance with the ballistics?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<div style=\"text-align: center;\"><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/m4NCribDx4U\" width=\"650\" height=\"480\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/div>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Sadly, there\u2019s little relief from frustration to be found in <a href=\"http:\/\/www.kingsmanmovie.com\"><em>Kingsman: The Secret Service<\/em><\/a>, a movie where mercenaries miss wildly, bespoke suit shops double as entryways to underground lairs, henchwomen have deadly blades for legs, and umbrellas serve as body shields.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Oh, and there\u2019s <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm0000168\/?ref_=tt_cl_t11\">Samuel L. Jackson<\/a> as this psycho tech genius whose primary inspirations appear to be a \u201994 Russell Simmons and a \u201904 Steve Jobs.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>To director<a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm0891216\/?ref_=tt_ov_dr\"> Matthew Vaughn<\/a>\u2019s (<em>Kick-Ass<\/em>,<em> X-Men First Class<\/em>) credit, it really does seem like he sought to create a cool Bond-meets-<em>Kill Bill<\/em> kind of world in which\u00a0promising youngsters like Eggsy (<a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/name\/nm5473782\/?ref_=tt_cl_t13\">Taron Egerton<\/a>) are recruited by an agent named Harry Hart (<a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Colin_Firth\">Colin Firth<\/a>) and trained to become the next generation of snazzy-dressed, exploding pen-toting action heroes. But the movie is just never quite poised enough to earn such a tag.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/03\/Blades.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-613\" src=\"http:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/03\/Blades.jpg\" alt=\"Kingsman The Secret Service\" width=\"700\" height=\"394\" srcset=\"https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/03\/Blades.jpg 1000w, https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/03\/Blades-300x168.jpg 300w, https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/03\/Blades-330x185.jpg 330w, https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/03\/Blades-690x388.jpg 690w, https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/03\/Blades-852x480.jpg 852w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 700px) 100vw, 700px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>A couple of crazy fight sequences show potential. But after the fifth gunshot to the head (by the eagle-eyed good guy, of course), it begins to feel heavy handed. There\u2019s also a moment where a newly trained Eggsy is about to save a damsel, but the scene is ruined by a dumb anal-sex reference.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>And then there\u2019s Sam Jack. We don\u2019t know what\u2019s more annoying about his character, his ridiculous lisp or the Y2K-approved wardrobe he\u2019s wearing.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The super-silly <em>Kingsman<\/em> shoots for a lot\u2014coolness, campiness, franchise-worthiness. But,\u00a0as is\u00a0the case with most of the guys with guns here, it simply misses the mark way too often.\u00a0<strong><em>\u00a0\u2013DeMarco Williams<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>RATING: <\/strong>Rated R for language and violence<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>GENRE:<\/strong> \u00a0Action Adventure<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>DIRECTED BY: <\/strong>Matthew Vaughn<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>STARS:<\/strong>\u00a0Colin Firth, Samuel L Jackson,\u00a0Taron Egerton<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><strong>STUDIO<\/strong>: Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>One thing that has always baffled me about Hollywood action movies is the shootouts between the good guys and villains. &nbsp; It doesn\u2019t matter&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":614,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[3,11],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/03\/kingsman-04-gallery-image.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5slei-9R","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/611"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/7"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=611"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/611\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/614"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=611"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=611"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/culturated.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=611"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}